How many points can you pick up from this weekend’s action?

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14


West Ham United vs Chelsea (Saturday, 12.30pm)

5 points: The London Stadium is full of festive cheer and good will to all men after Chelsea dismantle West Ham in a 4-1 away win. 

15 points: There are six minutes stoppage time and the end of the game and Gary Cahill’s elbows are responsible for five of them. 

25 points: Karen Brady takes a break from watching a rabble of disorganised, bone-headed egomaniacs and decides to go back to the Apprentice.

Burnley vs Watford (Saturday, 3pm)

5 points: The race for seventh remains in the balance after a 2-2 draw.

15 points: Andre Gray scored against his former club with only his fifth shot of the season – and of course refuses to celebrate.

25 points: Tony Gale notices that Richarlison is wearing gloves and wonders if he’ll ‘fancy’ a trip to Turf Moor. Yes, the Richarlison who had a gun put to his head as a teenager in a turf war in Brazil. 



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